A shakespearean translator love letter to the best car, the Mercedes-AMG C63 S

"AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop" (ac-2-shoes)
09/18/2017 at 18:56 • Filed to: None

Dearest Mercedes C63 S AMG,

Everything about thee is perfect, from thy futuristic curves to thy 500HP V8.

I wish for thy legacy to nev’r end, and wilt acquire thy at which hour thou art as low priced as a craigslist civic.

Sincerely,

A 13-year old car peat

DISCUSSION (26)

E90M3 > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 19:01

I almost bought a cheap AMG , it would have been one of the worst decisions I ever made.

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 19:01

Yes, hi, the BMW M4 Competition Package would like a word with you.

Kinja'd!!!

chaozbandit > BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo
09/18/2017 at 19:20

Too bad it costs more and doesnt sound as good

AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop > BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo
09/18/2017 at 19:21

What chaoz said

AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop > E90M3
09/18/2017 at 19:24

Look E90, while I respect you and love your posts, you’re pushing buttons here

E90M3 > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 19:33

Did you not click the hyperlink and read the whole thing?

2Fast2Furious: Rotary Powered > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 19:33

Cheap AMG? Lol

After a decade the entrance to the amg club may become cheap, but once you get inside your wallet can never leave full

Saracen > BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo
09/18/2017 at 19:35

Except that the C63 is better than the M4 in pretty much every single way. Except for that three pedal thing.

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > Saracen
09/18/2017 at 19:38

Eh. Debatable. I think 6 cylinder engines sound better than 8 cylinder engines.

To each their own.

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > chaozbandit
09/18/2017 at 19:39

I think it sounds better. I like a good inline 6. I prefer 6 to 8 cylinders.

AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop > E90M3
09/18/2017 at 19:43

Well, now I did. Nice article, sorry for being kind of hostile, I just assumed that someone named M3 was going to rag on an AMG. After reading though it seems you like it

Saracen > BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo
09/18/2017 at 19:43

Depends on the engine. My flat six sounds glorious. Better than many V8's. But not as good as any AMG V8's.

The S55 though, sounds terrible. Probably the worst sounding straight six.

E90M3 > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 19:46

Nah, I really like the C63. The M3 is a scalpel, a more delicate instrument. The AMG is a hammer. They’re both fast, but they do things differently. If I had the means I would own one of each. The reason it would have been a mistake is because of the timing, nothing wrong with the car itself.

AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop > E90M3
09/18/2017 at 19:50

Hammer? AMG?

Kinja'd!!!

AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop > E90M3
09/18/2017 at 19:57

Honestly I’ve always had a love for M3's, every one except the E90 Coupe, In fact here’s some E36 Pixel Art I did:

Kinja'd!!!

E90M3 > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 20:08

1. The “E90 coupe” is the E92, the E9Xs were among the first BMWs to have different designations based upon body style. Before E46 referred to the coupe and the sedan. In the E9X generation, E90 was the sedan, E91 was the wagon, E92 the coupe, and E93 the convertible. I know you’re not a BMW person, but I figured I’d share.

2. When I was around your age, 14, I made this model:

Kinja'd!!!

I, in fact, still have it. I’ve always like the E36s, it was really the first car I ever lusted after.

3. I didn’t really get into Mercedes until around my senior year of high school. It was the classics, like the 300D or the 560SEL that attracted me. I might honestly be driving one now, something like a C300, if I hadn’t found the perfect E92.

AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop > E90M3
09/18/2017 at 20:11

You made that?! How? Tell me so I can make my real favorite car, The BRZ

Discerning > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 20:14

I’m not a big fan of how they look. I work close to the Mercedes HQ in Atlanta and I see C-class coupes all day every day. There are about 5 of them in my community.

The styling is off or the proportions just aren’t right. Not sure what it is, but it wouldn’t even be on my list as a result. Maybe it’s bland? Not sure, but not interested.

E90M3 > AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop
09/18/2017 at 20:17

Well, it was a model, so I guess the more correct term is put together.

AC2 - The Now 15 Year Old Jalop > E90M3
09/18/2017 at 20:26

Oh. Still, great looking model

Saracen > E90M3
09/18/2017 at 20:40

While the scalpel and hammper analogy certainly applied to the E90 M3 and the 6.3 liter C63, it seems like the new biturbo C63's are out M3-ing the F80 M3 in every aspect.

E90M3 > Saracen
09/18/2017 at 22:06

I heard the M3 with the competition pack was a huge improvement. I wouldn’t know, I haven’t driven either of them.

chaozbandit > BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo
09/18/2017 at 22:19

Also debatable; no combination of turbo and tubing will make the S55 sound as nice as some other inline sixes, though I am using the later JZ/RB platforms as references. The M177/178 on the other hand has similar audible tones to the M156/159 they displace albeit 1.5L less displacement and two turbochargers.

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > chaozbandit
09/18/2017 at 22:25

I like how the S55 sounds. It appeals to me. Also, yeah, the RB26 and 2JZ sound great.

I can’t get over how good the M159 sounds, though. That’s probably my favorite V8.

chaozbandit > BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo
09/18/2017 at 22:45

M156/9 is one of the few engines that sounds good from the factory. Most if not all header/straight pipe combinations degrade the exhaust note and make it unbearable. In the case of the C63, its a delight everywhere in its rev range - the main thing letting it down is the gearbox.

BlueMazda2 - Blesses the rains down in Africa, Purveyor of BMW Individual Arctic Metallic, Merci Twingo > chaozbandit
09/18/2017 at 22:57

The SLS is probably my benchmark for V8s. That and the Voodoo V8 from the GT350/GT350R.